Ermes+Jimenez+Admission+Essay

Ermes Jimenez

 As an admission officer I Ermes Jimenez knows what is best from a student’s college application. I think the ranking from most important to the least important from a student application are  (1) **transcript**,  (2) **recommendation**, (3) **essay**, (4) **activities**, and (5) **SAT's.** I ranked it this way because this is what I think is most important. I put transcript as the top priority because I see things in terms of their grades. You could tell if the students worked hard all throughout 4 years of high school. Another thing the transcript shows me is how well they will do in college. Also you could notice if the person put effort in their classes. Then comes recommendations, this comes second to me because I would like to know whether you a positive or a negative influence towards their classmates. Also the recommendations show how respectful and helpful the person is to their teachers. Next is the essay, the essay shows how badly you want to go to college. It also shows how well you write and what effort you put in your work. The fourth thing on the list is activities. Activities is fourth to me because it shows to me and other admissions officers that you do work outside of school and in the summer. It also shows whether you are a lazy person or not. I would know if a student is a good worker or the student works hard to become his dreams by the internships in the summer and his activities for example: playing in a organized basketball team or baseball team and etc. Last which is 5th on the list is SAT's. I think that SAT's are supposed to be the last thing every admissions officers are supposed to look at because there are things being said about the test, a lot of students that have taken the SAT's said that it is bias. I personally don't care about whether it is bias or not but I really care that it gives prestige to student that are well test takers and that is not right to the students that have test anxiety.

Roman Polanco is a very hard working student. Romans transcript shows me the upward trend all throughout the 4 years of college. This is a student that would get pick to a college because it shows that he matured each year of high school. The best thing is that he finished high school with 90's and high 80's. Roman has a problem and that problem is that he has too many absents and lateness. No colleges would like a late comer. His absents and lateness is a big deal because it tells me that he is a very lazy to show up on time and he doesn't like school. Roman step it up on his school all throughout the years and this tells me by the time he gets in college that he is going to have less than 12 lateness and less than 5 absences. Romans essay is a very thought out and well done. He did not rush and it’s all perfect, it also answers the real question which is “tell me more about you”? Romans essay could be his savior because this is a fantastic essay and it tells me that he is a good leader. Roman is a very good leader, he been in student ambassador for all 4 years and and became the leader in 12th grade. Roman is working at a restaurant since 10th grade and he still working now. Roman did a lot of good community service work but didn't stick with it. This good of boosted him and help him recover things from his absents and lateness. Romans recommendation tells me more about him in his class. He is a very positive influence to other classmates and he active participate in class. This also shows that he takes advantage of opportunity outside of school that is offered to him. Romans recommendations also tells me that he is a trust worthy person and that help raise money for breast cancer which made him the most reliable person in the school. This is what makes Roman a leader. Romans SAT is slightly below average on two subjects which are critical reading and writing. In math is is slightly above average which is impressive. The SAT's doesn't actually affect him getting into my college because to me the SAT's are bias.

William Santos was not a hard worker until he got to the 12th grade. He was just passing the grade in 9th, 10th and 11th grade. These grades are no good. William had way to much absence and lateness, which is very bad because every year he kept being late and absent more than usual. His grade doesn't make sense because with bad grades in the 9th, 10th and 11th grade he wants to go to college to be successful. William is a good test taker, he has 90's and 80' in his regents score. William pushed him self a little in the 11th grade. William took advance math, which shows that he wanted to take math to a new level. Williams essay doesn't answer the real question. His essay shows that he is a very lazy person. William showed me that he didn't really care about going to college. William should know that the essay is very important to go to college. Williams bounces around in different activity, which is no good because bouncing around activity/clubs is not a way to become a leader. William worked from 11th grade as a stock boy for 8 months then after that in 12th grade he is working as a ticket salesperson. William is a founder of the comic magazines club which is a great thing to do. Williams recommendation is very short and it doesn't actually tells us a lot about him. This recommendation shows faint praise which tells me that William is not so good in school. Williams SAT's is very good he is way above average. He is a good test taker, William has all the SAT's subject over 600. This will show prestige at other colleges but in this college this will not show prestige. In my college what matters first is transcript than recommendation.

Jasmine Duke is a very hard worker. She has been absent 12 times in 4 years which is a good thing that she has been in school most of the years. She also been late only 1 time in 4 years. This shows me that she is a very proud student and that she cares about her education. Jasmines grades are mostly 80's and 90's most of all 4 years. Jasmine could of done better on the regents, she got 70's and 80's. She is not so good as a test taker. Jasmine's essay is not so great she doesn't actually tells me more about her. Jasmine instead of talking about herself she wrote about her mother. It's very good that her mother inspires her but I want to know more about Jasmine Duke. I think she was lazy to write an essay because even though it is not about her it shows that she did not make an effort to write more. Jasmine has been in the step club all throughout high school. She also been in the drama club too. Jasmine has other activities outside of the school which is church choir. She has been in the church choir for 3 years in 9th, 10th, and 11th, grade. She worked in 10th has a babysitter. Jasmine cares about her education because she showed me that wants to become successful in her life. She got a internship in the summer. Jasmine's recommendation is very very good. Jasmine is very hard working in and outside of her classroom. She wants to become a doctor and this is why she is working hard. This shows me that Jasmine knows to become a doctor she needs to work hard for the rest of her life all throughout high school and college. Jasmine shows me that she want a better life for herself and her family. Jasmines SAT's are not so great. She shows that she is not a good test taker. Jasmine's test score is below average. This will not affect her acceptance into my college because I heard things about the SAT's like is bias to other people that lived outside the United States. Also it is most bias to girls so i don't actually accept the SAT's score.

Kaylah Serrano works really really hard worker. It is impressive that she only has been absent 1 time out of the 4 years of high school. She has not been late not once. Her grades are 70's and 90's. Kaylah is serious about going to college, she took college classes. She also took advance math which is what college love to see. Students that challenge their self are the ones you would want in you school. She has shown me a lot from her transcript because her regents score is good but could of done better. Looking at the grades and the attendance makes her seem like she is amazing. Kaylah's essay is amazing! She shows that she wants a better life and she wants to go to college. Kaylah took her time to write an amazing essay. Also she knows what is most important to get in the college level. Kaylah doesn't have many activities. Kaylah did the jamming cares club for 9th grade only, which is not so good. She worked in the 12th grade and still working now. Kaylah's recommendation is the best thing you would read. She has a very good recommendation. This recommendation tells me a lot about Kaylah. This tells me that she works hard for her self and for her family. She challenged her self by taking a college level class. Kaylah is serious about going to college and she wants it badly. Kaylah's SAT's scores are below average in critical reading and writing. Her math score is above average she has 520 which is very good. This will not affect her because to me the very least important thing to look for in a student is the SAT's score. I think the SAT's shouldn't even be including in the importance of a college application.