shantice+McNeely+admissions+essay

Shantice McNeely

As an admissions officer, I am very clear about what is important to me in a student application The first most important thing to me is the transcript I like to see grades that are not to low but do not have to be picture perfect I do not not like to see to many lateness or absence. The second most important thing to me is the essay I would like to see a person write a well written essay telling the reader about his or her self. The third most important thing to me is letter or recommendation I would really love to see what other people has to say about that person somethings we should know about that person. The fourth most important thing to me the activities. I want to know what that student does outside of school what things are that person into somethings the person likes to do.

When reviewing William Santos application the first thing that caught my eyes was his SAT scores. Although his grades were not that impressive in his freshman, sophomore or junior year. He improved his grads in senior yea according to his lateness and absence I can see why his grades where very poor. In his senior year he was late a lot more than his other years in high school and about the same amount of absence but he managed to get okay scores on his transcript.

Williams essay was bad. It looks like he did it in about 20 minutes and did not take out the time to write it. I feel that if he was really serious about college he would have been more of an adult and made time to write an essay. After reading his essay I feel that I still do not know anything about William. I was really looking forward to reading Williams essay because I like to know some things about my student before applying to a school.Williams recommendation letter was fake but they tried to say good things about him.William had more breadth than depth but he did do some activities.

Jasmine Dukes SAT scores where a little bad compared to her high grades for her core classes.I think that Jasmines essay was very bad she only talked about her mother and how she wants to be like her. I did not learn anything about her and that is what the essay requires.I really think Jasmines letter of recommendation letter was good it said how she takes enrichment classes in math and science. I thought Jasmine did a lot of great things outside of school she was committed to her step team She had a job as a babysitter.

I though that Jasmines letter of recommendation was very nice and told me a lot of good thing about. Jasmine that I would have liked to know.

While reading Kayla Serrano's transcript I noticed her upward trend from freshman year to sophomore year. I that math and Spanish she had very good regents scores in math and Spanish. Kayla took honor classes and college level classes.

Her essay was very well written. It told me how Kayla moved here from another country and helped her family financially. Also telling me why she struggled in some areas. Kayla's activities were a little bad. Her letter of recommendation said that Kayla got a job o support the family but only in her senior year.I think she could have done a little more in the other three years.Her SAT scores were good and her math scores were grate.

While reading Roman Polanco's transcript I was amazed of the upward trend from his freshman year to senior year.His absence and lateness where very poor freshman year and got much much better in his senior year.

Romans essay was very impressive.It was very interesting I wanted to read more when I was done reading it.I got an image in my head when I read his story it felt like he was sitting in the room with me telling me the story.The letter of recommendation was genuine praise