Lenisha+Abbot+Admission Essay

As the admission officer in the rank I would put for __**Tears**__ //**of joy**// it would be in this order. Essay, Activities, Transcript, SAT"s, and last Recommendations. I put Tears of joy in this order because Essays are most important. They explain and show what and who the student is and are. Test do not define or give any information about the applicant/student that is why I put SAT"s last. For much as the Essay does it shows that. Activities was second because that show what the applicant did during there four years and also what they do at home/community to help. It shows what they would be able to do like "depth of breath". As for transcript I put it third because grade's are still important and tells you how will you did in the classes and shows what you might need to take or like to take. The transcript also shows if the applicants toke challenging classes and was on honor roll. I put SAT"s four because that is also your grade and to see how will you did. SAT"s scores show reputation on the school and that they would be able to pass any test that you give. Lastly I put recommendation last because it doesn't explain you even though its by someone else review and it could be "faint praise". The essay, activities, and transcript shows enough of what the student does. The four applicants are Kaylah Serrano, William Santos, Roman Polanco, and Jasmine Duke.

For William Santos when reviewing the applicant the first thing that I noticed about him was that his essay was okay it really did not answer the real question. It did not tell me about him or anything that I would not know. It only talked about him not like school and that in college that he would do better because of the classes. For me that is an unexceptionable essay that did not elaborate on who he is or what he went through. There was no hook that caught my attention and it seem like he did not put a lot of thought into the essay. For the activities he did okay. There was no real "depth over breath". However what I am impress about what he did for the twelfth grade he was a founder of the club. He was not a leader in any of the programs. I would have love to seen him be a leader. William's transcript was not good at all. However for twelfth he did have better grade. There is a upward trend at the end of the four year's. His attendance and lateness is bad. He would not even be there for the classes for college. His regent scores though are excellent to me. He has 87 and up. The SAT's scores are above average and are good there. For the CR:600, M:620, and for W:650. The SAT's are optional and can count for extra. The recommendation is not good enough for me to believe and does not tell us about the student in general. It does not explian the weakness or strength. It was more " __//**faint praise**//__ ".

For Jasmine Duke her essay was it tells me more about her mother then her. It looks like she took little time to do the essay. It seems like her mom is applying and not her. It could have been more thought into it. There was no hook for me or even explaining anything that I would not know about Jasmine Duke. The essay does not give answer the real question. There was no hook to caught my interest. For the activities she did okay with being there at the drama club but II do not know if she was a member or not. There is no leader or founder involved. She worked a little hard and did scripture reading in eleven and twelfth grade. There was no real "depth over breath". Her transcript was good. She did wonderful at passing her classes no higher then a 79. There was no upward trend. Her lateness and attendance is outstanding. She also took challenging or elective classes. On her regents she did okay it could have been better because she did will in all her classes. The SAT's was not good for me. In June 2013 she got CR:410, M:450, and for W:440. Then in November 2013 she got CR:430, M:470, and for W:410. It is like she took the challenging classes for nothing because she is below average in her SAT's. She took all of the subjects and did not do the best that you think she would for the scores average. The recommendation is good. It seems like "genuine praise". It explains everything about the student and says the weakness and strengths.

For Kaylah Serrano her essay was amazing it gave everything that we and I asked for. It gave a __//**hook**//__ to the stroy/essay and made me want to read it more and did not get me bored. It had a **//__epiphany__//** and it was not a spaghetti sauce essay. She took her time and put thought into it. Her activities was disappointing there was nothing that caught my eyes. She really did nothing and there was no " __//**depth over breath**//__ ". There was no leadership action or even member. Her transcript was okay she really did not stay in the 80's and keep it up. Her highest was 99's and she did okay on the regents. She had no upward on downward trend. Her SAT's was not really good she is below average and took all of the subjects twice and did not do will on them. For her SAT's she got CR:400, M:500, and for W:450. Later when she took it a second time she got CR:390, M:510, and she got W:410 for that. Last but not least her recommendation was great. It was " __//**genuine**//__ **//__praise__//** ". It told me why she struggled through some classes and and gave good insight about her.

For Roman Polanco his essay was outstanding. It gave me everything I needed to know about him. It gave a hook and a epiphany. There was specific examples and a before and after. He answered the real question and it was not a " __//**spaghetti sauce**//__ " essay. He made sure it would be right. For the activities he did good in and out of all applicant he was a leader for a program. It show that he has "__//**breath over depth**//__". The transcript for him was good enough. Not that impressive to me. However for senior year it got better. there was an upward trend. His lateness and attendance record was horrible. It did get a little better at the end of the high school year's. His regent scores were good and was high enough. His SAT's scores are not good. He is below average. He took it twice and did not do that will on it. He got CR:450, M:490, and for W:470. the second time he took it it was CR:480, M:510, and for W:490. On the recommadation it was "genuine praise" it told me about him and that he was a trustworthy individual. It backed up his essay that he did. It says about him being a late bloomer but successive later. It explained him and how he is in and out the classroom.

All in total Kaylah Serrano is the strongest candidate/applicant for me. Kaylah had a good recommendation and has a good transcript that has impress me through out all the candidates/applicants. Even though her regents scores are not that good she shows leadership and everything that is asked for. Her SAT's could have been better that will cost her to do more when/if she is in college. However she a candidate/applicant that I will like to have in my college.