Yordiana+Rodriguez+admission+essay

As an admission officer I ranked the TEARS as ETARS. I think that the essay is very important because it would tell me something about that student. I would like to know what is their main interests in my college. Why is it so important to attend to my college? I also think I would like to know the activities that they would like to be a part of. Transcript is the second most important to me because it would tell me how well or how poorly they did threw out their 4 years of HS. That would tell me there weakness and their strengths. The activities section would tell me what type of things they do for their free time. For example, do they work or are they a part of a sport team or etc.

In reviewing Roman Polanco's application, I saw that his transcript wasn't as good as it supposed to be. I rated his transcript as 3 out of 5. His grades on his freshmen year were very poorly. He was late 109 and was absence 55 days during his 4 years of college. Threw his years in High School he has improved a lot. He had a upwards trend in 11gth and 12th grade. I think he could have done a better job with his grades, if he have been in school more. He passed all his regents with 65 and above. His SAT's wasn't as high as they supposed to be. I noticed that he took them twice. His scores were between 400-510.

Roman's essay was very strong. I rated his essay 5 out of 5. He answered all the questions. He also had a good epiphany; he gave good examples about him being a leader. He explains his experience about creating a cancer walk. It also explains how hopeless he was and how inspired he have gotten threw out the years. His essay wasn't a spaghetti sauce essay. This means that he took his time. While viewing his activities, if I was to be asked to participate in the cancer walk I would have said yes and would have been honor. I feel like he cares about the community and is a very helpful person towards others. He also worked in a Taco Shop and in Julio Franco's El Ricon. He was a leader for the student ambassador in 12th grade.

While viewing his recommendation it explains his weakness and his strength. I notice how it describes how he has changed his life. He was a student ambassador. He sem like a trust worthy kid. He is very responsible with his school work. As a result of Roman being a late bloomer and having a upward trend in his grades and his attendance seem like he have become a stronger person. I was most impressed in the way his teachers would express themselves about him.

In reviewing Kaylah Serrano’s transcript she had good grades. Threw out her 4 years she was only late one time. She was never late. I notice that her grades were very good and she learned how to maintain them that way. Kaylah had mid 70's - mid 90's. She also took College Now Statistic at Hunter College. Even though she was in school every day her regents grades weren't as high as they should be. I would think that of her being in school every day she would not miss not work from any classes. Her SAT's score wasn’t as high as I would have thought it would be. Her grades on her regents were in the mid 60's- mid 90's. I notice that she took the regents more than one time. I think that was smart, but also that she like to take a lot of chances.

Kaylah's essay was too long for me. I think that the essay should be 500 words long. Her essay was very boring. On a positive note she had a good hook and had good epiphany. Her essay was not a spaghetti sauce essay. She explain her life entering America and how difficult she thought it would have been. I think she have accomplished a lot of things and have had to sacrifice herself.

I was disappointed to know that she was not into school activities. In 9th grade she was a part of the Jamming Cares Club. That was considering as depth. She didn’t stay committed to an activity that she has started. I think that it wasn’t a smart thing to do because I'm not sure if she would stay committed to any of my programs that my colleges provide for her. In her recommendation I notice that she has met all her requirements in college bound. I notice that she works 25 hours per week in Dunkin Donuts, which the money was used to help support her family. That was a very sweet thing to do. Maybe that might be her excuse of not going to after school clubs or programs.

In reviewing William Santos application I notice that he had a very weak transcript. Throughout 9th-11th grade he had mid 60's - mid 70's. I think that he could have done much better. He also had a very bad attendance. William was late 193 times and was absence 91 days. That is very ridiculous. I think that if he was in school more his grade would have been higher. I don't think that he is going to be responsible with his classes and his school work. This make me a little bit scared about allowing this student enter my college.

On his regents score I think that he did amazing. I would have thought that he would have done a horrible job. William regents’ score were in the mid 80's - mid 90's. That is fantastic. In the 11th grade William took advanced math classes. That is impressing. In reviewing his SAT's he had a very high score. They were all 600 and above. In my opinion for a student that missed a lot of days he had very high test scores. William actions were very impressing.

One thing that I notice, he was a part of a lot clubs. In 9th grade he was a part of the drama club and the JV Soccer Team. Meanwhile he was Inno-zine during the 12th grade (Comic Magazine about a super Innovator). I notice that he was a Founder of the club. Starting your own club show me leader ship and being able to take charge of things. William was a member of the Comic Book Club. In 11th grade she was a member in Film Appreciation. He was a part of a lot of things inside of school but also outside of school. He worked 12 hours during the 11th grade from October- June in Fanta's Hardware store. William also worked 18 hours during the week. He worked 35 hours during the summer. This occurred during the 12th grade and present in AMC Movie Theater, Union Square. I think that he showed a lot of dedication to his outside job. In his recombination I notice that he had a hard time staying focus but threw out the years he have learned how to maintain himself focus. William recommendation was very weak; it doesn’t explain his weakness or his strengths. There are no explanations about his accomplishments.

While analyzing Jasmine Duke Transcript I was impressed that threw out her 4 years of high school she passed all her class with 80 and up. During her high school years she was only late 12 days. She was absence only 1 time. That is very impressing. This shows me that she is dedicated to her school work. She was very responsible with her attendance. Her regent score were very good. Her scares were between 75- mid 80's. His SAT's scares were okay. I think that if she was to study more she would have done a better job. He scores was in the mid 400's. I guess she wasn't having a good day.

In analyzing Jasmine essay I was disappointed. She didn't have a hook. Her main topic of her essay was her mother. She described her mother in a good positive way. Reading her essay made me think that her mother was applying to this college. I thought that her essay made her chances of getting into my college low.

While looking at Jasmine's recommendation I thought that it was very strong. I thought that she was very strong in math. She took an extra class. Those classes were science and technology. According to her teachers she is a very hard working student. She is well respected by her teachers and peers. I think that is a lot of respect she need to gain among a lot of people. Her recommendation explains a lot of her hard work and her achievements. Over all Jasmine Duke is a very smart person that learned how to become successful.

In conclusion, I feel that all these students are strong in their own ways. After comparing all of the candidates I think that I would accept Roman Palonco. I feel that he didn’t have strongest test scores, but he manage to pass all his classes during the 4 years of HS. However he was late and absent a lot he still manages to give all his work in and pass. His regents’ score were very high. He also had a upward trend in 12th grade. In his Activity sheet I notice that he was a student ambassador for all 4 years. I think that is impressing. He also was a leader. My college wants a student that could take charge and that could lead others into doing the right thing. So Welcome Roman Palanco to our college.