Jessica+Medina+Comparative+Essay

__Comparative Essay__

As an admission officer, I look at the essay first. It tells me more about the candidate as a person and what they are like. They don't really focus on academics. It lets me know the kind of personality that the candidate has and sometimes it describes their view point of life. After that, I look at their recommendation. It tells me what a teacher or counselor thinks of them. It lets me know how the student is involved in the classroom. Also, it might tell me if the candidate has gone through any challenges in his or her life. After, I look at the transcript. It lets me know how well they did in their classes. It tells me what were their weaknesses and their strengths. Also, I could see if that person had an upward or downward trend in their classes. After the transcript, I look at their activities. I could see what they were involved in and what they liked to do. I could see how committed they are by seeing how much time they spent in that activity or job. I see if it's depth over breadth. Lastly, I look at their SAT's. They aren't that important to me. Their scores don't tell me much about how the person is like.

When reviewing Roman Polanco's application, I saw that he had an upward trend in his transcript. In his freshman and sophomore year, he had mostly 60's and 70's. Towards his junior and senior years, he did better and got mostly 80's and 90's. His grades do make sense. His latenesses and absences contribute to his grades the first two years. In two years, Roman had 75 latenesses and 40 absences. But, his latenesses and absences also got better towards the end. His Regents scores were good. He scored mostly 80s with some 70s.

I really enjoyed Roman's essay. It lets me know more about the kind of person he is. It had a really good hook. It made me want to read more and it kept the essay interesting. It was well organized. There were no spelling or grammar mistakes either. It let me know at the beginning that he was second guessing about being in that club and he wondered if it was worth it. Then at the end, he realized that he could make a difference in the community and it was worth being in that cub. He also had a good recommendation letter. It doesn't give faint praise. His recommendation letter tells me that he's a late bloomer and that's why his grades weren't that good. It also also tells me about his personality. It tells me that he's trustworthy, reliable, helpful, and has a strong presence in the classroom.

Roman was in Student ambassadors for all four years of High School. He was also in the debate club for his junior and senior years. He also has a job as a waiter, cashier and busboy. He works there eighteen hours per weekend. He's been working there since 10th grade. This is good because it shows me that he's committed and could stick to something for a long time. He became a leader which is important to me because leadership skills are very important. Finally, Roman's SAT scores were some what below average. He scored all in the 400's except for the second math SAT that he took which he scored a 510 on. His SAT's don't really matter to me. He didn't do very good but I don't really take that in to consideration.

In reviewing Jasmine Dukes transcript, I was very impressed with her grades. It's very obvious that she is extremely smart and she's a hard working student. This contribute to the fact that she had 1 lateness and 12 absences. But, she didn't take any challenging classes. It would've been good to see her take challenging classes since she had such good grades. Her grades stood consistent throughout High School so it all made sense. Her grades stayed in the 80's and 90's. Her Regents scores were good. She scored 80's and 70's.

Jasmine's essay didn't impress me at all. It didn't answer the real question. I didn't read an epiphany. There was no before and after. I didn't learn anything about her. I learned more about her mom than herself.It didn't show me how she grew as a person. On the other hand, I loved all the activities that Jasmine was involved in. She was in the step program and drama club for all four years in High school. This is very good because now I know that she's committed to what she does. She sticks to what she has to do. It show me that she's a leader.

Jasmine's recommendation was impressive. There was genuine praise, no faint praise. It let me know how Jasmine is as person and how she acts at school. It tells me about her personality. It tells me that she wants to be a doctor and it tells me that she tries her best. She's extremely hardworking. She's well respected. It shows me her citizenship. Also, it tells me about her challenges in life. It tells me about her difficult past and what she had to go through. I know that it motivates her to do her best. so that I know some insight about her life. Jasmine's SAT's were somewhat below average. They were in the 400's. I expected to see a bit of a higher score based on her grades. But, her SAT grades don't really matter to me. It's not a determining factor for me.

Kaylah Serrano's transcript was pretty good. Her grades were not very impressive. In all of her High School years, she had 70's, 80's and 90's. They are not great, but good. She took challenging classes. I saw that she attended College Now Statistics classes at Hunter College. She also took Intensive Advanced Math Enrichment and the Comic Books Enrichment. I noticed that she did very well in Math and Spanish. But, her weakness is in English. Also, she only had 1 absence so I really liked that. Her Regents scores were good but not great. She scored really high in some and then in others she didn't score very good. For example, she did really good in Math and Spanish. But she scored kind of low in Living Environment, Global, and English.

Kaylah's essay was very impressive. It answered the real question. I learned a lot about her. Her essay had an epiphany. She had a moment of realization. She grew as a person because of her experiences. I learned that she's form an immigrant family. So, I got to know more about her life and what she's been through.You could see how she went from thinking of life in a negative way to seeing life in a positive way and doing good in school. Also, her essay had a good hook. It was interesting. It kept me wanting to read more. Her spelling and grammar was perfect.

Even though Kaylah is a really good student, I was very disappointed in the amount of activities she was in. She was in the Jamming Cares Club for just one year in the 9th grade. She was also walked her younger brother to school each morning in 9th and 10th grade. Finally, she has been working at Dunkin' Donuts as a counter server since January of her 12th grade year. This shows me that she doesn't have leadership skills and she doesn't really stick to something.

kaylah's recommendation was impressive. When I read it, I could tell that it was honest and it was genuine praise. It told me about her personality and how she is as a student. It also let me know why she was struggling in the classes that she was having trouble in. So it gave me some insight. Kaylah's SAT's were pretty good. She did below average in critical reading and writing. But, she scored higher in math. This makes sense once you read her essay or recommendation. Overall, I thought her grades were pretty good.

When looking at William Santo's transcript, I saw an upward trend. All throughout his 9th, 10th, and 11th grade years, he had mostly 60s and 70s. I noticed the upward trend in 12th grade. He had mostly 80s and 90s. His latenesses and absences contribute to his grades. In the first 3 years of High School, he had 110 latenesses and 100 absences. He did take a challenging classes in Math and English. William's regents scores were very good actually. He scored 80s and 90s which was surprising since his transcript didn't look so good.

I was really disappointed when I looked at William's essay. I didn't learn anything about him. It didn't show me how he grew as a person. It didn't tell me if he learned anything from a past experience either. So there was no epiphany. He only explains why he got bad grades and that doesn't tell me anything from his personality. I was also disappointed at William's recommendation. There was faint praise. It tells me that he's a bright young man and that he's determined. That's the only thing I learned about him as a person. It then tells me that he could do well if he applies himself and that worries me.

I wasn't very impressed with William's activities. He was in the drama club, Soccer team, Inno-Zine club, the Comic Book club, and the Film Appreciation club for one year each. But, he took care of his dog for all 4 years. His activities showed me more breadth over depth. This didn't show me much leadership skills. Finally, William's SAT cores were above average. He scored 600s in all of his SAT'ss which is impressive but it still doesn't tell me about the kind of person he is.

After comparing all of the candidates, I think that I would accept Kaylah Serrano. Her essay really impressed me. It let me know about her life. I felt like I really knew her. Secondly, her recommendation was genuine. It let me know even more about her. I now know why she got the grades she got because of struggle's she's had to overcome. If you look at this, plus her transcript, activities, and SAT's, she would be a student that I would love to have in my college.