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Kaylyn Laviera Admission Essay
As an Admissions officer, I rank the T.E.A.R.S as T.E.R.A.S. which mean’s transcript, essay, recommendations, activities and SAT's. I rank them in this order because to me grades are the most important to me; it shows how smart a person is. Essay is second because they essay talks about themselves and show there personality. Recommendations are third because it shows what other people think of you. Fourth Activities because they show what do you do besides school. And SAT s last because most people have test anxiety and they are not really important to me but good to have.
In reviewing Roman Polanco application, I saw that he had an upward trend, 60's and 70's in 9th grade to 80's and 90's in 12th grade. Throughout the 4 years of high school his grades improves from freshmen year to senior year. Also throughout the year his attendance has improve from 9th grade to 12th grade. Roman standardize test they are good. In his essay it talks about Roman, and his 1st sentence has a hook. He also realized should have been doing good deeds all along. For example in spring Roman and his peers were raising awareness of breast cancer, in the essay grammar and spelling very good but not perfect. Roman Polanco recommendations his very nice, they talk very positive about him. For example they explain how actively participated in class, contributes to class discussions, also reliable, caring and a leader. But also they explain he is a "Late Bloomer" and explains his upward trend. In Roman activity section he was the ambassador for all four years, he show depth. He became a leader of student ambassadors. Roman SATs below and above average for example he is slightly below average for critical reading, slightly above average in math and also slightly below average in writing.
William Santos application I see that he has 9 - 11th grade barely passing, in 12th grade high 70's and -90's. He has an upward trend in high school. He has poor attendance and lateness. His standardize test scores was very high 80's and low 90's. William Santos essay don’t answer the real question. It looks like it was not carefully written. He showed specific examples by talking about his grades. But there was no growth, hook or epiphany. Santos recommendations were poor the counselor explain how destined for success at the college level. Also it explains how he maintains a consistent with his academic performance. It also elaborates on his SAT scores and high they were. In Santos Activities we were a founder in 12tn grade in an Inno Zine Comic Magazine. Throughout high school Santos did not stick with one activity. But through high school he had community/ home activities he had to take care of family dog, walk, and feed clean up after them. Also he has work experience for example we work in Fanta Hardware, he was the stock boy, he work 12 hours a week and he work in 11th grade Oct- June. Also he work in AMC movie theater, Union Square, he was the ticket salesperson, he work 18/ week during school, 35 during the summer and 12th grade, June- Present. William Santos is very good above average. In Critical Reading he has 600, Math 620, Writing 650.
Jasmine Duke Application grades are constant basically throughout high school. Jasmine only has been absent 10 times throughout the year and late once. Jasmine regent scores were 75 to 85, In Living Environment, Global Studies, Integrated Algebra, Us History and English. In Jasmine essay it doesn’t answer the real question it talks about her mom mostly. I feel that this essay is a spaghetti sauce essay because it was less than 500 words and had no information about her. In Jasmine Duke recommendation was good they talk about her in and outside the classroom and showing how she was a hardworking consistent member in their community. For example it says that she always tries her best on her assignments everything small homework assignments to a mid-term exam or major paper. Also it explains her character she is a hard working applied herself at programs to reach her goal of becoming a doctor so she took up Science and Technology at Baruch College every Saturday. It also explains her obstacles for example Jasmine are part of an immigrant family who came to this country in a search of a better life. She has a struggling mother and she has extra responsibility at home. Jasmine Dukes activities have been a member in drama club all four years, also in knitting with Claire Club in 11th and 12th grade. Community and Home Activities in the church choir all four years and scripture reader 11th and 12th grade. And also work experience Lawrence and Dabbu Jett she was a babysitter for 10 hours a day and she was working that job 10th grade, January to June. Another work experience was an internship Children Museum for a Science as the Junior Tour Guide for 30 hours for the summer 11th grade going to 12th grade. Jasmine SATs are below average in critical reading, math and writing.
Kaylah Serrano application grades are average throughout high school. Kaylah grades constant throughout high school. Her attendance is great she only have one absent throughout the school year. He standardize test her grades are good but they can be better. It makes sense because her test grade looks mostly like her regular grades. Jasmine Duke answers the real question. It does talks about her and the obstacles she had to go through. She has perfect spelling and grammar in her essay. Serrano recommendations are very good it talk about Kaylah and how she is in the classroom. It says she is determined and focuses with her academics and most recently with the college process. It focuses on her strength in Math and Science. Kaylah has also challenged herself in these areas by taking college level classes at CUNY- Hunter College. Some activity’s Kaylah joined is the jamming cares club and stayed there for 9th grade. Some community and home activities is that Kaylah walk younger brother to school each morning in 9th and 10th grade. She also had work experience she was an employer in Dunkin Donuts as a counter server and she work 20 hours a week and she work there 12th grade, January until the present time. Her SATs scores good there were above and below average.
I really liked that Jasmine Duke because her transcript was great. I say that because throughout high school her grades were constant and she maintain 80-99 grades. Her attendance she was only late 1 time and absent 11 times. And she has good standardized test grades. I understand that her essay don't talks about her mom. But it does shows she is good writer. Her activities show me she is reliable and she is very responsible. Jasmine recommendations are very nice it shows how her personality is even though Kaylah didn't write her essay to herself. His SATs aren't high but she is close to average, also there is chance that she has test anxiety.
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